Long-Distance Relationships: 3 Benefits and 4 Tips

Relationships, by their nature, require commitment. Maintaining a relationship long distance takes even more. There are lots of reasons the distance occurs, from relocation for work or school, military service during deployment, and even from the beginning. In our current dating landscape, people in different locations find it easy to start relationships long-distance through dating apps and social media.

Whether through choice or circumstances, couples in long-distance relationships often find themselves having to navigate the challenges and obstacles that come from living far apart. As daunting as it is to maintain a meaningful, fulfilling, and healthy relationship, it is possible.

With the right attitude, creativity, a positive mindset, and intentional strategies, couples can go a long way in creating a deep bond. Several tips and strategies can be helpful for couples in long-distance relationships. For those seeking additional support, San Diego Christian Counseling offers resources that can strengthen connections and enhance communication in these unique situations.

Focus on the positive side of a long-distance relationship

There is a tendency to just focus on what could go wrong in a long-distance relationship but there are some advantages that are also attached to them. If you find yourself in a relationship separated by distance, consider focusing on these three potential advantages instead of the negatives.

Strong communication

Because they can’t see each other, couples in a long-distance relationship often try hard to fill each other in on all the minute details of their lives. To feel connected, they must paint the complete picture for each other. Some even make mental notes of what they will tell their partner when they speak next.

This puts purpose and more meaning to their ensuing conversations. On the other hand, taking comfort in proximity, couples who live together or stay close to each other sometimes overlook sharing the details of their day.

It is easy to mumble an incoherent response or sit in comfortable silence when you are in the same room, but when you are on the other side of the phone line, you are expected to listen attentively to give a meaningful response. This can lead to better listening skills by both, which may help the relationship thrive.

Ability to maintain individuality

Through no one’s fault, it is easy for couples to lose their individuality in efforts to accommodate each other. Hobbies, friendships, and goals can be lost in the process. This may lead to loneliness and resentment in the long term.

A healthy relationship has good boundaries where each can pursue their own hobbies and goals. Likewise, each is encouraged to maintain friendships and relationships with extended family members. When you are in a long-distance relationship, it is easier to grow as an individual.

Little time to fight

When you live apart and get together only at intervals, you are constantly aware that the clock is ticking and that your time together is limited. Instead of focusing on common conflicts that arise from cohabitation, couples in long-distance relationships often try to make the most of their time together.

As the old saying goes, “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Couples in long-distance relationships appreciate every moment spent together and they intentionally create memories to hold on to until the next time they can see each other again.

The long-distance relationship must have an end date in mind

Although there are potential advantages to long-distance relationships, time apart without an end in mind, may create stress that ultimately causes it to fall apart. If there is an option, you must work toward a bigger plan of eventually staying together in one geographic location.

This may mean one party relocating or both parties moving to a mutually convenient place to accommodate the couple’s or family’s needs. Without a doubt, this takes a lot of compromise, but for the relationship to work this is one strategy that a couple may need to consider.

The decision on where to ultimately settle must not be driven by selfish reasons but rather by practical and careful considerations, including the financial or safety advantages of choosing one place over others. Another consideration is the proximity to support systems that the couple will require.

Regular and meaningful communication

Nothing kills a relationship faster than growing apart. Poor communication is one of the biggest drivers of wedges between couples. Talking to each other does not always translate to meaningful and effective communication.

Communication between a couple is about intentionally letting each other in to enable a deeper level of understanding. It is important to have candid and open conversations with your partner discussing your fears, needs, and expectations and to address any conflicts as they arise.

With technology, it is easier and cheaper to communicate with people in different geographic locations. If you are in a long-distance relationship, use these tools to speak every day and fill each other in about your daily lives. You don’t always have to spend hours on the phone for communication to be meaningful. Whatever you say to each other, however, must be aimed toward improving your relationship.

You can engage in playful banter to deepen your friendship, be vulnerable with each other to encourage trust, be supportive in your actions and speech when your partner is going through a difficult time, and most importantly always aim to back your words with action. All of these strategies will improve your communication and strengthen your relationship.

Visit each other when you can

If you have the opportunity and resources, make sure you visit each other as often as possible to maintain the physical connection between the two of you. A thriving Christian marriage must have both emotional and physical intimacy. As much as telecommunication and virtual conversations have made long-distance relationships better, seeing each other regularly remains important.

The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. – 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, NIV

This verse highlights the importance of married couples to maintain the physical intimacy which is essential for a marriage relationship to thrive.

Pray about long-distance relationships

Maintaining a stable relationship is tough. Many temptations and challenges come that threaten the relationship. As a Christian, you must include God from the start so that He gives you the strength and the wisdom needed to navigate this landscape. Deuteronomy 31:6 (NIV) says, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

As a couple take courage and comfort in knowing that you do not have to walk this challenging journey alone. Pray to God for guidance when things are tough and do not be discouraged because the Lord is faithful to those who trust in Him.

Seek professional support for long-distance relationships

Are you in a long-distance relationship or are you about to begin one and wondering if it is wise? Sometimes when you are faced with such a situation, your judgment is clouded, and you may need others to help you process and see things clearly. If this is how you are feeling, call our offices today and book an appointment with one of the counselors at our offices. They can help you navigate this journey. For personalized support, consider San Diego Christian Counseling to guide you through the complexities of your relationship.